Games Games Games Games

How do you know Daryl? Other than having a semi-poker face, doesn't really talk much and having a tendency to smile or just laugh by himself out of the blue. Due to my repressed ability to talk to people normally unless its something interesting or 'business-like' discussions which involves mundane and boring talk - My other half who feeds and lives in the online world is a whole different story. I don't know why.

But anyways, Since my brother and mom came down to KL I have the utter glory of raping his PS3! I just recently finished Assassin's Creed II and I can say its the most awesome sequel to its predecessor. Albeit being a little short and the overhype factor, its still worth playing the game - as a rental. Too bad that word doesn't really exist in Malaysia. But anyways there is another game which I nearly completed but fucking frustrates me to the core.

Demon Soul's. God. I tell thee. I spent nearly 5 hours figuring out which character is best suited to my needs. Spent 5 hours of gameplay, and another 7 hours of dying and retrying the levels. Maybe because I don't have lightning speed reflexes and I'm getting old D:

But so far... life has been no better than it was. Oh yeah. I can't wait for January. Oh lala~

War... War Never Changes.

AFTER hearing about the conference to criminalize war, I just laughed in glee at the fact that our 'dearest' ex-PM who had initially brought the country down on its knees was going to preach about peace. In my view, War will never end, War will never be stopped. You may preach for peace and wish good will - in fact, your just scared of losing at the material wealth you've earned with sweat and blood, your afraid to stand up and die for your country and more importantly you know who the real monsters are.

We are the real monsters. So what if you criminalize war? Essentially another one will begin, we fight wars everyday. Be it by murdering a hundred people up to a million, it does not matter. Those are the wars advocated by the military industrial complex, through the rigorous spam of fear propaganda and hate. There is also race wars, policy wars, cyber-wars and etc. War is everywhere, you cannot stop it. Eventually it will lead down to bloodshed. Because you cannot deny it, we do have that power. Once you have learned to spill blood you are able to do so without a whim of regret.

Human are pathetic creatures, animals... civilized and intelligent animals. If you think I am wrong, go look at yourself in the mirror. Then you will see not the Hollywood monsters that were made through special effects and movie magic. You see the monster in its purest and unadulterated form.

Directed Anger

Now I don't normally discuss, rant or talk about things like this openly, however... someone decided to irk me today questioning my sexual preferences. I just hate, and hate, and really, really hate, when people just make assumptions. Come on, it doesn't mean hanging around more guys than ladies makes me a fawking queer. Just put it simply that here are the main reasons why I don't hang around women much:

1. I am a uber dork.

2. My level of geekdom will literally turn every conversation, by the will of Goodwin's Law into something which will lead to the Nazi's or bashing the political ideologies.

3. So far, no one shares the same hobby with me except guys. Which is playing games (hardcore.literally.), watching Anime, reading Manga and go on spontaneous walks into the city getting lost on intention to find a shop which is never there.

4. Don't ask me to change because, you don't have the damm right to judge or say what you expect out of a person. You are your own prisoner, not me. I've probably have been through more shit than you can ever imagine and suffered a lot more than you ever had.

In fact, you have the cheek to try to embarrass me in front of your girlfriends. Luckily, silence is gold in that situation. But if it wasn't for my ability to hold my anger, I would have definitely give you one nice smack in the face. I'm sure you have said your prayers every night before you sleep you twit. Remember the verse: Do not put us to the test? Sure as hell, don't test my patience.

On the other hand, I'm only acquainted with this dumbfuck through work. If you don't know the person well enough, stop talking a lot about them. People like you really makes my blood boil to a point where I can feel the darker half overtaking my rationality. Thats probably why you haven't been sent to greener pastures, because of your foul mouthed demeanor.

Grr... Seriously fucking pissed. I'm going to go kill players in WOW.

Der Wille Zur Macht

FROM time and again, I have contemplated with the fragments of the past and I have never really regretted doing something which would have some cause and effect on the road in life. So it has been a long time since my departure from the societal-biased view that our conservative parents think will make us survive here in Malaysia worthwhile. But I am blessed with the fact that I do have an understanding father who has supported me even from my fall from grace (Twice it happened >_>), and sadly a not so great supportive mother who always churn like an air raid alarm.

Nevertheless even with such difficulties and daily disappointments like getting old, lack of interaction, friends disappearing into the abyss (partly my fault too :D), living on a tight allowance to curb spending, work and letting the warp infested miasma of a brain I have spewing out heresy which I haven't even got the chance to reason with (O_o?). Hmph.

So, this is it. I have finally found my true calling, albeit the strange relationship I have with it. It was not a dream come true, I always aspire to be a games designer, yes. However, this sudden interest arose not by chance or magically conjured. It came from the challenge of getting it right, just like a virgin's night and of course seeing people reel in excitement after tasting food. But I must admit, I'm not so great as my Dad in cooking, but I strive to be better! I have always try to recreate the dishes my father cook because... his cooking is the most awesomest thing you can ever imagine. If you think mine was good, his is like four steps higher D:!

But of course, now I am wondering what kind of things I should do when I truly start my course. There is a language module which is in the course semesters, they offer Mandarin, German and French. Of course, being me, I would pick German... BUT~! We must be practical, if I were to work in this god-damm racist of a country, to increase my revenue and income due to the fact that I know there will be monetary problems if I choose to go to Germany for my practical -__-". Mandarin is a good choice realistically. Then of course, what cuisines to specialize in.

Frankly speaking, anything boleh punya. I don't have any particular affixtation for certain types of cuisines. I like know all, if possible. Chinese is the de facto best choice though. Why? Simple. Nothing can beat the superiority and flexibility of chinese style cooking. I can bet you that the people who earns the most money from hard work with a coffee shop, earns more in 12 hours compared to a 24 hour mamak. Well don't get me wrong on what I'm about to say next, but according to my observations, the Chinese are the ones who spends more on eating out than cooking at home here in Malaysia. The Indians and the Malay's are not huge spenders compared to the Chinese if it comes to food. You may refute this if you want.

Then again, why being so racist? Then I shall say, a simple logic is that if people have money. People want recognition and the desire to eat at somewhere elegant and brag to their friends the next day on how good the food was, it would be by the logic of word of mouth that your food is good and you payed for it at a reasonable price.

So I have set my sights on joining the culinary world soon enough. However, hehehe... do not think I have given up on Law just yet. I don't just give up that easily, I remember re-doing my A levels after like nearly two years since I've failed the first time. Now I have my A levels cert in hand only to KO at LLB =_=". It may take a while before I can start back on Law, because it is seriously not something instigated by me. But nevertheless, once I do something, I'll make sure I finish it. Time is irrelevant to me, despite my cruel self depreciating 'I'm getting old sarcasm'. Yet, before I pass on from this world when the time comes, I prefer not to leave any unfinished business - even if I do hate it.

"Aiya, are you a man or a woman? You like her, go and ask her out!"

"I am a woman."

"Oh..."

- Lesbian love is not my thing D:

"Nein, Nein, Nein, Nein, Nein!"

"Oh Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes!"

- Inglorious Basterds

"Love is a fool's game. There is no such thing as true love for me, love is the metaphor for infatuation for the common folks nowadays."

"So your saying everything is just lust to you?"

"Yes. In fact, tell me have you ever felt the need, the desire to grab the person you like, ravage them savagely, have wild sex and then think, then what after this? Have you ever think of commitment, responsibility and meant the three overly used words after that?

"Well, I'll get back to you if I am ever infatuated, lusted after a person or even 'fall' in love. In fact, that never happened to me and I don't think it will be at anytime soon."

"You know, you sounded like something inside of you died a long time ago."

"Same as thee, same as thee."

- Anon